Restless Legs, Tired Soul

I probably need to get back to writing something everyday, because as things currently stand; I only seem to be writing on days that suck. We’ve had a decent handful of days since I last posted, but I’m really not loving today.

For most of my life, I’ve never had to deal with insomnia or other sleep issues.  I guess now’s as good a time as any to join the legions for whom trouble sleeping is a problem.  I’ve diagnosed myself with restless legs syndrome based on the fact that I frequently find myself waking up with, wait for it, restless legs.  The first couple of occurrences were manageable.  A little reading or a quick meditation and I’d drift back to dreamland.  The past couple of nights, though, neither of those tricks worked and I was up for a long time.

I am tired.  Yeah, I’m always tired.  But I don’t usually wake up tired.  I did today, though.

And then I moseyed on over to Facebook, where I was greeted with memories of things I’d posted on this day in past years.  No bueno.

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 A year ago I was griping about being late to church because of my husband.  Then celebrating the first sermon of Jonathan, who we’ve gone to church with for something like 13 years.

I miss my church community.

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Two years ago we were at a soccer tournament in Des Moines.

I miss soccer.

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Three years ago I enjoyed dinner with college classmates, while on my way to celebrate the graduations of my two nephews- one from high school, the other from college.  The same college Chris and I attended.  I was beyond excited to be back on campus and watch my nephew become a graduate of my beloved alma mater.

I miss dinners with friends.  And graduations.

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And, going back to one year ago.  Strangely enough, this one still applies.  I used to be tired due to our rigorous schedule.  Now I’m tired from all the things I miss.  And my restless mother trucking legs.

Perhaps if I’d had a decent night’s rest, these memories wouldn’t have been so hard on my psyche.  But I hadn’t had a decent night’s rest.  So these memories were not a great start to my day.

Ultimately, today was fine.  I worked, which is always good.  Kids survived distance learning, Chris worked from home, blah, blah, blah.

But, I’m tired.  And missing normal.

Be Well, Friends.